boom

New plan

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 14:38:31 -0600

Winter hobby: learn PHP and how to build Wordpress Themes.

It couldn’t get any hotter than that.

wtfcomcast: Totally not good.

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 13:52:31 -0600

wtfcomcast:

Totally not good.

#Neuroses. Or: Why reading is better than dating.

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 12:38:11 -0600

beenthinking:

So I was talking to my delightful friend Sal this morning, who married her college sweetheart and is pregnant with her third child and is generally in as different a station of life from me as one could possibly be. Which makes her a good, easily entertained audience for tales of my rusty / awkward-since-the-dawn-of-mankind dating style. And eventually our conversation came to this: Why can’t I just send out a google survey to men?

Maybe at the beginning of a flirtation to gauge compatibility and candor, again at the end of a relationship like an exit interview.

On a scale of one to five, how appropriate was my outfit for a date? Did you understand that it’s just too cold to show décolletage? Are you going to be disappointed to learn that I don’t have décolletage? SURVEYOR’S NOTE: If you’re a big breast man, this isn’t going to work. Let’s just put that out there right now. From one to five, how much of a sense did you get for my issues? Can you already tell I’m overly-expectant, jealous and have unrealistic demands? Or did my sparkling laugh and self-deprecating tales of falling down the stairs at IKEA and lost skirts at Girl Scout banquets distract you from my need for therapy? Do you like glittery eye shadow? Wait, was this actually a date? Are you going to be funny and enthusiastic in six months? Is it ok if I don’t actually care about sports? Did you laugh at the story about my best friend and Moroccan squat toilets so I would kiss you or do you actually see the hilarity? And when I asked questions about your life to show interest, were you flattered or did you feel interrogated? Because I get that sometimes. Have you ever read my blog? SURVEYOR’S NOTE: You can’t take it literally, you know. I can write about being in love with five different men before lunch and still consider myself single and holy as a bird by tea time. Or maybe you CAN take it literally and this is my fundamental issue in life… Would you be offended if I copied my therapist on your survey response?

I drew up an “application” years ago for this very thing. I wonder what ever happened to it…

nightmarebrunette: Do you know the visceral reaction that comes...

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 16:53:13 -0600

nightmarebrunette:

Do you know the visceral reaction that comes with watching someone do something well? The type that’s sexual without necessarily being lustful, because it’s too tinged with awe? Minute 1:27.

It’s the kind of feeling that deserves to last more than 2 minutes and 43 seconds.

If I could fly, I'd be...

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 16:24:00 -0600

A Pegasus, obvs. LOOK HOW AWESOME.

Tracy Flick

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 20:59:52 -0600

syntheticpubes:

What do you call these relentless people who succeed despite their lack of depth and self-awareness? (In school we called them Pre-Med, or sometimes Future Senator.) They are hordes of productive insects who chase goals simply because so many others want them too, like hormone-drunk high school kids mistaking competition for lust.

It’s already a tired refrain in this atmosphere of economic contraction, but maybe success—a luxury sedan, a McMansion, a trophy spouse, mountains of debt—needs to involve more why than how.

Why would you want to live in a soulless, eight-year-old suburb of Phoenix? So you can afford a 4500 sq ft monstrosity with granite counter tops and stainless steel appliances? Really? Why is that your best notion of fulfillment?

Speaking of more-how-than-why, I occasionally stumble across prolific bloggers whose cringe-inducing attempts, despite their sincerity, fall miles short of engaging. Where would they have been twenty years ago? Writing for small town newspapers?

The internet tossed publication costs out the window, and I guess I’m uneasy that technology has provided an escape from the old systems that we counted on to grind hopeful young people into the homogeneous pulp that goes into the sausage known as GDP.

Instead, charming people like Merlin Mann are finding success in telling people to keep at their creative ventures until something sticks, no matter what.

Do we really want more people trying their hand at creative stuff? Isn’t attention a finite resource? I feel some sort of tragedy of the commons thing coming on. I already have a hard time keeping up with all the internet fluff I’m addicted to. Clay Shirky would call this ‘filter failure’, but sometimes I feel like he’s saying, “No no no, you’re just using too much heroin. That’s your problem.”

ANYWAY

Yeah, I feel like we’ve got a lot of boring-yet-relentless people out there armed with a pirated copy of Photoshop or a fresh WordPress install. Then, in the next instant, I wonder how many people more intelligent than I dismiss me in a similar manner. For every Tracy Flick you see, there’s probably someone who loathes you in exactly the same way.

HALP

GPOYW The Inexplicable Good Mood Edition. OR I Didn’t Do...

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 13:15:00 -0600

GPOYW

The Inexplicable Good Mood Edition. OR I Didn’t Do Shit With My Hair Edition.

"Real love lost really breaks my heart. It’s really only truly lost if it’s dead. If there is a..."

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 17:07:00 -0600

“

Real love lost really breaks my heart. It’s really only truly lost if it’s dead. If there is a death. It’s hard to convince yourself that love is lost when it actually lives two stops away from you on the L train and it doesn’t feel like coming over. That love was never found. For a while, in the beginning, you looked for it together. You looked for it in drawers and closets and underneath couch cushions and in between the sheets. But you just couldn’t find it. And then you stopped searching, stopped trying, stopped swiping your metrocard…

I’ve been thinking I should start going to funerals. I believe that is where perspective is born. Yes, like Will Ferrell in Wedding Crashers. But the female version. Looking for someone who’s looking to feel, for slightly longer than twenty minutes to one hour. I don’t think this is anything new. There are always random people who sit in the back of the church during funeral services. Sometimes people just want to cry. Sometimes a broken heart is so much more attractive than a sturdy one.

”

- filmosophy.: Sleepless in Seattle (1993)
Oh, Meredith. I like the way you think.

(via beenthinking)

Yep.

myvintagevogue: Vera-Ellen - White Christmas

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 17:04:53 -0600

myvintagevogue:

Vera-Ellen - White Christmas

Special Family Story Time

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 22:27:45 -0600

Since I’m not often inspired to do more than reblog a youtubes video, I’ve signed up for this Plinky service. It asks a daily/weekly/whatever question, or offers you a chance to share something, and you answer it. This is my first question.

“Share a favorite family story.”

One Christmas, back when our families still rotated the festivity hosting duties and I was one of the younger kids in charge of passing out of the gifts, my Grandma Katie got a little bit drunk off, like, a half glass of wine or something. I don’t remember a lot about that night, but I do remember Uncle Moose pretending to sit on Grandma while she lay on the floor and giggle herself almost into a coma.

I’m going for two because it’s nearly impossible to think of this hilarious memory of one of my late grandparents without thinking of another.

One Thanksgiving, possibly a different year than the above story, my Grandpa Ken fell asleep in the lounger, as he always did when they visited. Except this time he farted and it startled him out of his nap, which he promptly tried to blame on someone else. Everyone laughed.

Man, I miss them.

Taylor says, “We tried.” (uploaded by me) Taylor and...

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 20:31:00 -0600

Taylor says, “We tried.”

(uploaded by me)

Taylor and I drove down to the Mayo Clinic, where we heard DIO had been admitted due to stomach cancer. We attempted to drop off a care package and/or get an unlikely chance to see him. Neither of those things happened.

Cons:
Not getting to see DIO.

Pros:
Listening to DIO for 3 hours
Now we know where the Mayo Clinic is

"don’t confuse sex and love. just because she touches your dick does not mean she gives a fuck about..."

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 17:20:00 -0600

“don’t confuse sex and love. just because she touches your dick does not mean she gives a fuck about you, it just means you got a dank cock.”

- things i’ve learned
Respect!

(via theopie)

This also, obviously, goes the other way, which is a hard fucking lesson to learn, my friends.

"He will hang his belief that you would make great friends on the smallest of compatibilities—..."

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 17:15:00 -0600

“He will hang his belief that you would make great friends on the smallest of compatibilities— for example a shared interest in a band, which he makes an awful lot of hay out of. He may talk a lot about how victimized he’s been by cruel ex-girlfriends in a ploy for sympathy.”

- Found this 4 year old livejournal post through a response to someone’s missed connection post. This is particularly relevant to me as I just dealt with a Nice Guy on OKCupid, which I’ve since disabled, because fuck dating. (kidding. sort of)

A rather bitter young man pointed out a single common interest in a band, followed up with telling me to look at “all the things in common we have on our profiles” without getting AT ALL specific about what he felt those were, and when I told him, rather politely, I didn’t think we were a match but good luck, he informed me I was an idiot.

The reasons I didn’t consider him a good match are because we had no other common interests, which was the entire basis for his initial email, which means he didn’t really bother to read beyond my musical preferences (he’s lazy), his profile was uninteresting (he’s dull and lazy) and a little bit arrogant (“I’m good at lot’s [sic] of things, which I say with humility”), and I didn’t find him physically attractive (think Dwight Shrute’s less attractive cousin). We also had major misses on the critical topics, such as children. And drinking.

In addition to all that, he’d been a member of the site for about 4 months and didn’t bother to answer any of the “personality questions”, because he considered them stupid. Some of them were stupid, yes, but if you answer enough of them, potential interests can see where you stand on some pretty important issues. I don’t require matching opinions on every single thing because that would boring, but some things are deal breakers. Why bother with a dating site designed to produce potential matches based on how you fill in your profile and answer questions if you’re not going to utilize the tools? Just hit up craigslist or go out to the bars and start guessing zodiac signs. Your chances will be pretty much the same.

Amber, being the quality chick who always has my back, called him out on it and told him he should apologize. I blocked him with no response so he couldn’t even if he wanted. Instead he pulled the “nice guy” card and complained that I didn’t give him a chance and I must think pretty highly of myself to reject someone who OBVIOUSLY shares so much in common, and that I was clearly a fucking moron for not seeing it. Rejection issues, low self esteem, rage. HOT. Then he called Amber a few choice names, laid down some bitter tasting shit, and basically revealed himself to be exactly the kind of Nice Guy dissected so articulately in the linked post. Yes, you’re right. How will I sleep at night knowing I turned down such a good guy?

OKCupid ladies, stay away from OysterBoy2.

Arrested Development, the entire series for $29 - Amazon (today only!)

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 09:59:22 -0600

Arrested Development, the entire series for $29 - Amazon (today only!):

Looking to buy me a Christmas gift? Of course you are.

via kottke.org

Today, Try to Be a Little Less Positive, Will You?

Thu, 03 Dec 2009 09:20:44 -0600

newsweek:

Our Nancy Cooper talks to Barbara Ehrenreich about how thinking positive has ruined us all:

So, what’s wrong with being happy at work?
Ehrenreich: Well, it’s wonderful to be happy. Optimism sometimes is justified, but what has happened in the American business culture has been some kind of staggering retreat from reality. I always assumed that corporate culture was rational because of my background in science and in journalism, but what I began to understand in the 1980s, 1990s, and throughout this decade was that the business culture had become unmoored. The idea of being the CEO went from being someone who had mastered the business to being someone who was a charismatic figure. Some business writers started to talk about the corporation more like a cult.

I remember reading one of these crazy books on attraction—about how you can get what you want by wishing it. One of blurbs on the back was written by a guy who worked for the company that held my retirement funds. That scared me. It’s clear that the build-up to the financial meltdown involved real denial and people acting on the idea that it’s bad to have negative people around.

How has this emphasis on positive thinking changed workers’ daily lives?
It means artificial smiling and artificial cheer. It’s a strain on people emotionally; the effort of managing the appearance of one’s emotions is work. It means not asking the hard questions you think about asking. When people have been criticized for being negative at work, very often what that means is that they asked too many questions. I always thought asking questions was a good thing.

If anyone needs any tips on how to curb their optimism, just let me know. I have this in the bag.

mediation: monilandia When will Dave Grohl finally realize we...

Thu, 03 Dec 2009 08:28:22 -0600

mediation:

monilandia

When will Dave Grohl finally realize we were meant to be together?

Amazing illustrations by designer Jimiyo. via World Famous...

Wed, 02 Dec 2009 08:03:18 -0600

Amazing illustrations by designer Jimiyo.

via World Famous Design Junkies

chuckolsen: Steven Seagal, Songs from the Crystal Cave. Hmm,...

Wed, 02 Dec 2009 07:55:30 -0600

chuckolsen:

Steven Seagal, Songs from the Crystal Cave.
Hmm, the Crystal Cave. Is that where they put people who make forgettable music?

Wow, that was mean.

(via bringtheruckuss)

How does he have the time for this when he’s cleaning up mean streets of Jefferson Parish as a deputy sheriff?

Also, have you seen him lately? Remember when he used to not be ugly?

Driving down to Mayo on Friday with Taylor to visit Dio, WHO HAS...

Tue, 01 Dec 2009 15:20:36 -0600

Driving down to Mayo on Friday with Taylor to visit Dio, WHO HAS STOMACH CANCER. We’re bringing him a sword and the power of metal. Look out for pictures of us standing on the lawn of the hospital.

In a nutshell

Tue, 01 Dec 2009 15:04:17 -0600

me: more awesome sauce: we revised the application down to 3 pages, and it got approved and uploaded to the site without anyone telling us that happened.
So, I turned back 3 applications today because they were only 3 pages.
goddamnit
those providers are probably like, uh, do you want the instructions with it?
Taylor: wow
that's pretty awesome
I bet they're like "these fucking people don't have any idea what they're doing"
me: Yep.
And they're right.
Taylor: and you're all "we don't have any idea what we're doing"
me: Who knew they'd approve an entirely new application in under a week? WHO SAW THAT COMING?
Taylor: and not tell you
me: Oh, that part I'm less surprised about.